Not Me

My fire alarm definitely didn't start incessantly beeping a few weeks ago. And it wasn't me who pulled it off the wall, hoping that would shut it up. I didn't put it in a cabinet where my husband put the other fire alarm that started incessantly beeping. That fire alarm surely did not continue to beep inside that cabinet and I definitely didn't hear it through the closed doors. Which means I most certainly didn't finally decide to set it out on our balcony. And it definitely didn't start going off when our neighbors below us grilled out one night. I did not wave it inside our apartment to get it to stop and then put it right back out on the balcony. And I most certainly don't hear it beeping right now, through the balcony door.

So if you hear a beeping when you walk by our building, don't come knock on our door. Because it wasn't me.