While at home for Christmas break during my Senior year, God woke me up early one morning and whispered to me, "I have someone for you." I didn't understand why it was important for God to tell me that. I was sure God had someone for me; it was just going to be a while before I met him.
The weekend of April 11th, 2008 I had plans to stay in Belton, TX with a few friends for the weekend. It was a chance to do nothing. Kelly had to drive back to Abilene on Saturday night to finish up an art project, while the rest of us planned on returning sometime on Sunday. On a spur of the moment decision, I rode back early with her. On the drive back, I got a text from a friend in Abilene about a going away party for this guy Dustin. I had met Dustin through the last guy I had semi dated. I went back and forth on whether or not I should go.
I finally decided to stop in, but only for a few minutes.
I met my friends at Bedford Street Pub. When I walked in, I passed a guy who was on his way out. I remember thinking he was pretty cute. I hung out for a little bit with my friends and then we headed back to their house. When I was there, I kept thinking I should leave because I had church in the morning. Then the cute guy from the Pub showed up. He eyed me, walked over and stood next to me. I waited for him to say something to me but when he didn't, I said hi and introduced myself to him. Pretty out of character for shy me. We talked for the rest of the night. I found out a lot about Nathan, including that he was the weekend weather guy on one of the local Abilene channels. He knew Dustin through the news station--Dustin was the sports guy. After our conversation, we made plans to meet at church the next morning. He also got my number, explaining that I would probably need someone to hang out with over the summer in Abilene.
My friend Lisa and I met Nathan and Dustin at church the next day. As we were walking in the parking lot after the sermon, Nathan asked if I would be around the next weekend. I said yes, thinking he was making tentative plans for us to meet at church the following Sunday. Lisa understood his question as plans to take me out on a date. I told Lisa I didn't think I liked him that much and therefore probably wouldn't be going out with him on a date, if in fact that was what he meant.
The following Thursday, while student teaching at Dyess Elementary, I received a text from Nathan asking if I wanted to go to Starbucks with him later that night. Apparently Lisa had been right about him referring to a date, not church. I waited a while to respond. I wasn't sure if I should go. I didn't know if I actually liked him. And then there was the bigger problem: I had sworn off guys until August and it was only April. I called my mom and Lisa, asking them whether I should go or not. Both of them said there was no harm in having coffee with a guy one time. I still wasn't completely convinced but texted him back saying yes. I went home and by the time I was done getting ready, I was felt a little more at peace with the situation. I met Nathan at Starbucks and we had the best time, talking for hours. I was supposed to leave about an hour and a half in to meet Lisa and some of our friends at a dance hall. I was thankful before I met Nathan at Starbucks that those plans were in place so that I had an excuse to leave because I was sure I would want one. I actually ended up showing up really late to meet my friends because I really didn't want to leave Nathan. I was having too much of a good time talking with him. However, in our conversation, I found out Nathan was slated to leave for OTS in Alabama in only two months. I remember thinking to myself that if he was leaving in such a short amount of time, there was no way this friendship we had started could lead to dating. I still tease Nathan that our first meeting at Starbucks was not actually a date because he didn't pay for my coffee. He says he didn't want to pressure me, and I think that might have helped me feel a lot more comfortable around him.
The following Saturday I was at a friend's birthday party when Nathan texted me, asking me to hang out. I told him where I was, what I was doing and invited him to come over. I doubted he would stop by, considering he didn't know any of the people there except for me. I was also nervous because those friends of mine are highly eccentric. Much to my surprise, Nathan quickly accepted and drove over. Again, we talked the night away, this time in the kitchen. My friends thought he was a really cute, nice guy. And he didn't think they were too weird.
During our conversation that night in the kitchen, I asked Nathan if he would come to Dyess and talk about weather to the first graders in the class I was student teaching in. He said sure, not thinking I was serious. That Monday I asked Ms. Hodges, my cooperating teacher, if Nathan could talk to the students. She was thrilled about the idea. So much so that she asked the three other first grade teachers if they wanted to join in on hearing our guest speaker. I informed Nathan about his audience of 80 seven-year-olds. He was not so thrilled. He was nervous because he had never worked with children before, especially not in explaining the weather. I became nervous about my genius idea too. If he was terrible, the teachers would hold me responsible. So for his sake and mine, we met at Chick-Fil-A and discussed what topics he should cover and how to engage little children. We also got into talking about spiritual things. I was shocked to find that some of the ways I viewed God and our relationship with Him were shared by Nathan. Despite attending ACU, I hadn't met very many people who thought the way I did on such matters. My mom was the only person I could openly talk about spiritual things with. I had found a “Silas” at last. I remember leaving Chick-Fil-A that night and immediately calling my mom. I told her about my conversation with Nathan and happily announced to her that I finally had a friend that was like me, that I loved talking to.
Nathan came to Dyess to talk to the first graders and he was a huge hit! The kids were interested and the teachers even learned a few things about the weather. He now has a standing invitation to teach their first grade students any time. I was so proud of him and it caused me to like him a little more. The teachers picked up on my concealed (or so I thought) interest in Nathan and from then on I was constantly harassed about “the weather man” in the teacher’s lounge.
Right around the end of April I began to feel my interest in Nathan die down. I think I felt too pressured by everyone around us knowing about our friendship/dating relationship. I again thought I was concealing my now lack of interest really well. I found out later that Nathan completely picked up on it. Despite that, he stuck around.
We had our first official date on May 1st. I had just completed a capstone project for my Honors coursework and Nathan took me out partly in celebration. We ate dinner at Lytle Land & Cattle, went to a nearby park, met Lisa at Bedford for a little bit, then finished up the evening by watching Charlie Wilson’s War at my house. That night we also had our first kiss. I had been wondering when Nathan would kiss me but was almost dreading it because I was so nervous.
The following week he helped me and my roommates clean up our backyard for an end of the year party we were having the last weekend of the semester. And he made me a peanut butter sandwich before I had to leave to teach kids at church that same evening. I completely appreciated his genuine desire to help me do anything but I just didn’t think I was going to overcome the fact that I was beginning to pull away.
We had the party at our house that weekend and Nathan was there. We talked and danced, but I kept my distance. Again, he helped us clean up the entire house after everyone had left. I was still impressed by his character. I didn’t know any guy like him.
The following Thursday, May 9th, he took me out on a date and surprised me with a bouquet of roses and a card. They were my early graduation present. I waited to open the card until after we returned from dinner. While Nathan hung out with my roommates and some friends in the living room, I stepped into my room to open the card. Inside was a letter. I was nervous. But by the end of the letter, I felt my interest in Nathan begin to grow. In the letter, Nathan stated that he knew we were both about to begin new chapters in our life that would take us in different directions but that he didn’t want that to mean that we would discard the relationship we had. He just wanted us to “let the chips fall where they may.” Interestingly, that letter caused me to stop pulling away from Nathan and to instead fall toward him in a way I had never done with any other guy.
My graduation was that weekend and my family was in town. Nathan had told me days before that he would like to attend my graduation but I felt like that might be awkward. I never told him not to come, so he showed up and sat with Kelly. Afterwards, he met my family and joined us at my house for a little while. My family loved him, especially my grandma. When we started to leave for lunch, I had assumed Nathan would come with us. By that point, I wanted him around as much as possible. But he declined, insisting I probably wanted some time alone with my family. I thought about him throughout the meal and couldn’t wait to spend more time with him.
The week after that, Nathan took me out to his house to meet his parents and youngest sister. I was nervous because I remembered Nathan had told me on our unofficial first date at Starbucks that he never let his parents meet any of the girls he dated because it always got complicated when he and the girl would break up. I took that to mean he didn’t count on us breaking up. At least any time soon.
About a week after that, Nathan took me out to eat at Little Italy and said he was taking me to a surprise place. I was highly intrigued. He drove us into a small neighborhood in the south part of Abilene. He parked at a dead end of a street and we got out. He then led me into a thicket of grass and weeds. All I could see were a line of trees. Then we came to a small clearing where I could see a lake and a dock with a gazebo over it. It was beautiful! We spent a good while talking there that night and Nathan even turned on Coldplay on his iPhone and asked me to dance. It was probably the most romantic night of my life up to that point.
That weekend I went to Dallas for the bachelorette party of my roommate, Tressie. Her wedding was going to be the next weekend. I had a great time with my friends and talked to Nathan once or twice. As soon as I got home on Sunday, I called Nathan to come over. The minute I hung up the phone, I got butterflies. Typically, after not seeing a guy I was dating for a few days, I would feel extremely awkward the first time we would see each other. But as soon as I saw Nathan walking through the front door, the butterflies went away and I was so completely happy to see him!
The following weekend I went to Dallas again for one of my roommates' graduation party and then we drove down to Austin the next day for Tressie and Chad’s wedding. I had thought about asking Nathan to be my date to the wedding but I feared I would frighten him with too much seriousness (aka weddings). I very much regretted that decision the entire time I was at the wedding. I talked to him on the phone after the reception and realized I missed his companionship terribly.
The Thursday after that, on May 29th, Nathan took me out to eat at Abuelo’s and then drove out to Lake Abilene. He surprised me with strawberry margaritas in an ice chest in the trunk of his car. We drank the margaritas and sat on the car trunk just talking. Then Nathan said he had something he needed to tell me but he wasn’t sure if he should then or not. I begged him to let me know what it was. He said it was that he loved me. I was skeptical to say the least. My response was, “What do you mean you love me?” I was very cautious about that word, and still am. People use it much too carelessly. He told me about how no girl he had ever met even compared to me and that I was the kind of girl he had been looking for, but thinking he would never find. I listened quietly. I certainly was not ready to reciprocate and tell him I loved him. But I remember telling him after our conversation, or rather his explaining, that it felt right for him to say that to me, which I thought was really strange.
We spent the month of June spending every minute possible together. We were truly best friends while dating. There were a couple of highlights that month. The first was spending a weekend in Paris, Texas with Nathan’s extended family at his grandparents’ house. I only have good memories from that weekend. I enjoyed getting to know his family better, and in the process, getting to know Nathan better as well. One of the evenings we were there, Nathan and I went on a walk down a dirt road across the street from his grandparents’ house. Nathan knew the road well. We talked about all sorts of things, and finally landed on the subject of marriage. We talked about it in general terms, referencing the marriages of family and friends. Finally Nathan made a statement regarding us being married and I replied with, “So this is it, huh?” with a smile on my face. It seemed surreal.
We also took a trip down to the river in New Braunfels with a guy Nathan knew from United and some of his friends. The only person I knew was Nathan and the only people he knew were me and his friend, Jason. Therefore, Nathan and I spent most of that trip hanging out together and talking, mostly about our future together.
Nathan had to be in Montgomery, Alabama on June 24th. Our last night together would be June 22nd because Nathan had to leave very early on the 23rd. So Nathan spent most of the 22nd spending time with his family and we planned to hang out that night. I spent my time apart from him picking out a card, writing him a letter, getting a picture framed of us, and buying an Air Force themed Bible. When I returned from WalMart to the parking garage at my apartment, I sat in the car for just a few minutes and was praying for Nathan and I. Then I heard God whisper, “I created you for him.” That was when I knew for sure, without a doubt, Nathan was The One. I could finally tell him I loved him. I was so glad I could tell him those words before he left for three months. The card I had bought was a singing, recordable one. The song was “I’m So Glad You Came Into My Life” and I recorded the message to say “I love you, babe!” When Nathan picked me up that night, I brought my gifts for him. He took me out to the gazebo and we talked for a while there. I gave him his gifts and the card. When he opened the card, the message played that I had recorded for him. At first, he didn’t realize it was my voice. It played again. He stopped, looked up at me and asked if I had recorded it. I nodded yes and he seemed ecstatic. It felt so nice to finally be able to say “I love you, too” to him instead of just smiling after he said “I love you” to me. And in the Bible I had marked Genesis 2:18 and the love passage in 1 Corinthians. They were, and have remained, significant to our relationship.
The next morning before he left, Nathan set up a Bose speaker for my iPod that he bought for me. To make sure it worked, he put in his iPhone and played “Sparks” by Coldplay. We danced and I cried. After getting his tire fixed at WalMart and saying his last goodbyes to his family, we both drove to Java City and had a few minutes to drink a little coffee. Then it was my turn to say goodbye. I cried. He cried. I cried a whole lot more. Then we finally drove away from each other, he headed to Alabama and I to my apartment. I felt like I didn’t know who I was anymore. Like a zombie. I slept a lot of that day away and cried quite a bit more.
The next few months were spent talking on the phone with Nathan late at night and writing emails almost every day, sometime two or three times a day. We grew a lot in that time, as individuals and as a couple. We had a very serious conversation about when we would get married only a couple of weeks into Nathan’s time at OTS--next Spring or Summer. Again, it was so surreal. I had not expected to meet a guy, love him, and discuss marriage within a matter of months. Especially not at the time that it happened. I was supposed to stay single until that August. It was late June/early July and I was already in love with a man and we were planning on getting married. Sometimes it still floors me. We decided to start our marriage counseling while Nathan was at OTS because most of the places he could get assigned to after OTS were so far away that we wouldn’t be able to meet with our counselors to discuss it. I was a little nervous about marriage counseling and Nathan was pretty hesitant about it as well. Not very many people have good things to say about it. But we thoroughly enjoyed it! It was a great way to bring us so close while we were talking over the phone, hundreds of miles away from each other.
Three weeks before Nathan’s graduation from OTS, he flew me to Montgomery to spend the weekend with him. I was so excited, but at the same time so completely nervous. We hadn’t seen each other in over two months and I didn’t know what to expect when we were together again. But it was one of the best weekends. I was finally able to talk in person with the man I knew I loved but had only had a phone relationship with for a good amount of time. That was also when Nathan revealed to me where he, and eventually we, would be stationed after he completed OTS--Shreveport, Louisiana. Neither of us was thrilled about the city itself, but we were highly pleased with its close proximity to Texas. It meant that we could see each other much more often than if he had been stationed in Alaska or Germany. It was really hard to leave on the plane at the end of those few days. But I knew I would be coming back for his graduation soon.
I rode with Nathan’s parents and grandparents to Montgomery for Nathan’s graduation from OTS. It was so wonderful to know he was done with being away for so long. Afterwards, Nathan and I drove to San Antonio and spent a couple of days with my family and then went to Abilene and spent a couple of days with his family. The night before he had told me had to leave to go to Shreveport, he told me he had a surprise for me--it was him! I was somewhat confused. He then explained that he had called in a few days of leave so he could stay until the weekend. It was the best surprise considering our time apart had been much longer than our time together.
The following months were full of short visits, phone calls, and emails. We were able to spend Thanksgiving together with my family, and I drove up to Abilene to spend Christmas Day and a few days following with Nathan and his family.
We had discussed getting engaged in the late Fall or early Winter so that we could get married in the late Spring or early Summer. So I was anticipating our engagement for a while before it happened. Nathan was leaving for WOC in Mississippi at the beginning of February and would be there for two months. I expected it to happen before he left, and there were only so many weekends before then that we were going to see each other. On January 23rd, Nathan drove in from Shreveport and we made plans to go out that night. I thought it might be that night. He seemed a little weird on the phone. But then when he came to pick me up, he was only wearing a t-shirt and jeans. I wasn’t so sure anymore. He told me he wanted to catch the sunset so we had to hurry. I wanted to know where we were going, but Nathan said it was a surprise. After driving toward south Abilene, I knew we were going to the gazebo. I was sure we were getting engaged then. We sat on the dock, and even though we had missed almost all of the sunset, the sky was still really pretty. We talked about our history together and Nathan surprised me (again) by playing “Sparks” for me on his guitar. I cried. I was sure we were getting engaged. Then he set his guitar back in the case and we talked a little more. Maybe not… Then he asked me to dance. I found out later that was just to get me to stand up so he could kneel. He ended up talking just a little more instead of dancing and then he got down on one knee. I asked him, “What are you doing?” He smiled and told me to hang on. Then he said a lot of things that I can’t remember, things like how much he loved me and wanted to be a good man for me. Tears were streaming down my face. Then he pulled out the ring box and asked me to marry him. I said yes and we hugged and kissed. It was so dark by then that I couldn’t even see the ring. He put it on my finger and then we headed straight to the car so we could go eat dinner. When I could finally see it in the car, I loved it! It was so perfect, but it was a size and a half too big. Our first stop as an engaged couple was a convenience store for some tape that I could wrap around the back so it wouldn’t fall off my finger. Nathan then suggested we eat at Chick-Fil-A, an absolute favorite of ours, but I requested Lytle, the steakhouse where we had our first official date. I called and texted friends and family about our engagement while we waited at dinner. Everyone had been waiting for our announcement and were excited to receive it.
After our engagement, Nathan left for two months in Mississippi. We fell back into our familiar routine of phone calls and emails. I was able to spend a week with him during that time that we were both so grateful for.
On May 9th, our families finally met at Nathan’s parents’ house in Abilene. We ate lunch together and everyone had a good time. It was such a relief because we had both been a little nervous about it. Our families are a little different and we wanted so much for them to get along.
Two years ago, I never would have guessed that this is what God would have had for me. He has truly blessed me with Nathan. I never thought I could have what Nathan and I have. I used to think that people who got engaged or married very soon (less than a year) after dating were doomed to fail in marriage and were not making very wise decisions. I am one of those people. But I now know that it isn’t about the amount of time two people spend dating, even though that can be a factor in their marriage. It is so much more about knowing without a doubt that God meant you for each other and how strong your commitment to each other really is. Nathan and I have had our fair share of arguments, some very significant and some a little on the petty side. But we know that we are going to be together through thick and thin, and that is what causes us to grow as individuals and as a couple. We strive to understand marriage the way God intended it to be. We strive to understand the roles God created for us as male and female, as well as the strengths and weaknesses we have as a man and as a woman. We want to have fun together, to understand each other, and to support each other in our individual and joint purposes in life.
Engagement picture at Starbucks, where we had our first technical date
Engagement picture at the gazebo, where we got engaged
Oh! P.S: The Bachelor last night was great. Michelle is still on; we are all dismayed. A girl got sent home for having an "inappropriate relationship" with one of the crew members. And she didn't even seem to be upset or feel bad about it. We filled out ballots for the top three girls. Mine are 1: Ali, 2: Elizabeth, 3: Kathryn. Can't wait 'til next week!
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